Hi Dobi, My other dog (Izzy) keeps asking why she wasnıt included in the 2005 MyDarnDog.com calendar. I told her it was because she had gotten over that ³My Darn Dog² stage a few years ago, before I had a digital camera to document the destruction. That said, Izzy came up with a great idea. She volunteered to reenact all of her earlier mayhem, but I quickly squashed that idea. Instead, I told Izzy that I would make up for it by submitting a couple of funny Izzy photos to you and retelling some of her past stories. She said that sheıd think about this deal while I type. So here goes. First off, Izzyıs arrival was a bit premature. She was supposed to come home with me in late July of 1998 (which would have put her at about 8 weeks of age). However, after five weeks of life with Izzy, the breeder called me and asked me to come get her. Apparently little Izzy was already creating mass chaos ­ digging holes, chewing on plastic food dishes, and getting the other puppies to do the same. So little Izzy, who barely fit in the palm of my hand at the time, came home early. Despite the fact that she was sharing her new home with a human (me) and another boxer (Barney), Izzy made it clear from the very beginning that she was, in fact, The Queen. And when the Queen isnıt happy, ³ainıt nobody happy.² One of the things that Izzy really didnıt like was sleeping in a crate at night. She would have been much happier roaming the new house, looking for things to eat. Plus, there was all that nice carpet to pee on! But, alas, she was stuck in a crate, and she made it quite obvious that she was not a happy camper. For the first month of Izzyıs new life with me, she cried all night. It was like having a newborn ­ she just wailed and wailed and wailed. I vividly remember waking up the first morning that she actually slept through the night. There was no crying ­ I thought she was dead! So that issue was finally over. But Izzy was only beginning her career as a troublemaker. She found Barney to be a nice older brother, but he was kind of boring. All he ever wanted to do was sleep. To Izzy, this was unacceptable. There were toys lying all over the place, and toys needed to be played with! When Barney refused to partake in the playing, she decided to force his involvement and simply treated him as her favorite chew toy. Putting those sharp puppy teeth and claws to work, Izzy spent the majority of her time being carted around the house by Barney, firmly attached to his neck and jowls. Poor Barney looked as if heıd been through a battle, and yet he was very patient with this extremely annoying and troublesome smaller version of himself that I brought home. At some point, Barney must have had enough, and let Izzy know it. The outcome was a lot of barking, scratches and hurt feelings, but the end result was that Izzy was going to have to find her own entertainment. This was when she turned to destruction. And in typical Izzy fashion, she started out big. Hoping to let me know how unhappy she was being left in the car while I was out playing a soccer match, Izzy decided that instead of barking out the window, sheıd just eat the back seat. Not just a little tear. Not just a little bite. When I returned from the game, all that was really left of the seat was the metal frame. Izzy had removed the cloth covering as well as the foam padding. The entire back portion of the SUV was full of fluffy foam bits and the seatbelts were gone. Izzy was extremely proud of this feat. This was a great start! Of course, she set the bar so high that it was tough to top that initial destruction. Izzyıs motto quickly became ³quantity, not quality² as she set out to eat as many things as she could. She must have known that she was going to outgrow this puppy stage at some point (that was the rumor, anyway) so she set out to make the most of it. Nothing was safe from Izzy: baseball hats and running shoes drying in the laundry room, tupperware containers left helplessly on the counter, the neighbor kidıs whiffle ball that would land on our side of the fence, books left on the coffee table, the remote control for the VCR (this was before DVDs), the mouse for the computer. A lot of these things I wouldnıt noticeŠ.until about 3am when they would resurface along with Izzyıs last meal, usually in the middle of the living room carpet. Like most children (and many adults) Izzy goes through phases. She eventually outgrew the destruction phase and decided to focus her attention on fruit ­ bananas in particular. Yes, little Izzy has a banana fixation. Even in a state of deep sleep behind a closed door, Izzy can detect the peeling of a banana. Is it the smell? The sound? I donıt know. All I know is that I havenıt been able to eat one in peace since she developed what we like to call ³Izzyıs Keen Banana Awareness² (IKBA). It is usually accompanied by the most pathetic ³Iım sooooooooo hungry² look youıve ever seen. These days, Izzy spends a lot of time sleeping (maintaining IKBA requires a lot of energy). Iıd say that sleeping is probably her favorite hobby, but she also enjoys eating, farting and licking. In fact, she does a lot of this, which is probably why my family and friends never visit us anymore. Anyway, that is Izzyıs life in a nutshell. She will turn seven years old on Memorial Day 2005. She no longer fits in the palm of my hand, but sheıs still The Queen (and she makes sure I donıt forget it). Right now what The Queen wants is to join her big brother Talented Teg the DIY Dog and to be a part of MyDarnDog.com! Camille Olympia, WA